Ghost Beach? You're not even trying Stine. No "Terrible secret of Ghost Beach" or "Don't go to Ghost Beach!". Just Ghost Beach? They just handed you money didn't they asshole.----------------------------
Executive: So listen R.L. we need another Goosebumps book. You got any ideas.
R.L. Stine: Yeah the other day I was at the beach and I was all like "What if there were ghosts here?" and then thought "DING! Damn R.L. you got another winner on your hands!". And right after that my children said they hated me.
Executive: So what are you gonna call it?
R.L. Stine: I was thinking "The beach with ghosts" or....(GASP) I GOT IT! "GHOST BEACH"!
Executive: Brilliant! Heres a million dollars!
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So the books about these kids who go to visit their aunt and uncle in this small town. When they get there they meet these other kids who have the same last name as them, because apparently the gene pool in this place is fairly shallow. Now these inbred fucks proceed to tell them about
this spooky cave.....
.....that has this flickering light and apparently is haunted by ghosts. So the kids, being retarded and all, decide to go check out this cave. But it turns out the light in the cave isn't a ghost....IT'S A SCIENTIST THAT STUDIES GHOSTS! Yes and he lets the kids know that the inbred fucks they were chatting with earlier ARE GHOSTS! HOT DAMN! But thats not the big twist...the big twist in this book is....that the kids aunt and uncle are....GHOSTS! HOT DAMN AGAIN! Wait....now I'm sorry but didn't anyone notice that the aunt and uncle died. How did the kids parents not realize that.
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Dad: Hey Judy guess who I got a letter from today.
Mom: Who?
Dad: Richard and Janet!
Mom: Didn't they die in a mysterious fire two years ago?
Dad: Thats what I thought....BUT it seems they're okay! And they want the children to live with them for the summer!
Mom: Why that sounds like a great idea! Where do they live again?
Dad: Ghost Beach! KIDS START PACKING!
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Kids, I would consider giving childrens aid a call.
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